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Bill And Hillary Clinton Just Became Fugitives From Justice

Moments after their lawyer informed them that a grand jury had returned indictments for the Clinton Foundation cargo hauling scam that turned out to be an international drug smuggling enterprise that supports terrorism, Bill and Hillary Clinton vanished.

FBI Special Agent Marcellus Wartel says he doesn’t understand what happened:

“We’ve been staked out at the end of their driveway for days so they couldn’t flee if they were indicted. They were on the front porch. They got a phone call, they went inside — now they’re just…gone.

We searched the house and nothing. Luckily they’re two of the most recognizable faces in the world. It’s doubtful they’ll get far, and now they won’t get bail, either.”

The Clintons were handed indictments on charges of operating a criminal empire under RICO, trafficking in class A, class B, class C and class D narcotics and controlled substances, treason in the form of support for terrorist enemies of America and tax evasion for more than $400 million. Their lawyer has no comment on their whereabouts.

A man familiar with the Chappaqua residents said the Clintons loved the house for its history, which included a processing station for prisoners during the Civil War:

“There’s tunnels running all through this here town. Ther were sometimes 200 or 300 men a day being sent through to secret POW camps. They had to disappear when they got here. My guess is the Clintons used one of those.”

Old survey maps of the Chappaqua tunnels show a junction right below the Clinton compound and an exit about 3 miles away at an abandoned airstrip. Federal agents are following up on that lead.

2 Comments

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  1. Sounds fishy to me. The first thing I thought of was tunnels. You don’t have to be Einstein! But, our FBI leaves a lot to be desired. It’s very unfortunate to have to say that, but, Comey proved without a doubt that the FBI is corrupt – bought and sold. If this is a true story….of course they’d let the Clintons escape.

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